Understanding Gender Ethics and Loving Your Neighbor through a Biblical Lens

Over the past twenty years, the way that our culture talks about gender identity has changed dramatically. Just look at the data—a 1,300% jump in Google searches from people questioning their own gender since 2004. That is a huge shift, and I am sure you have noticed it on a personal level in conversations with family and friends! Yet, despite all the efforts to remedy this, confusion about identity is not going away. In fact, it is deepening. We are in the middle of a cultural moment where it is vital (especially for Christians) to step back and think clearly about what identity really is. This means examining gender through both a biblical and philosophical lens and comparing today’s shifting ideas with timeless truth.

What Do We Mean by “Identity”?

How we define terms shapes everything else, so let us start with definitions. In the past, “gender” was basically interchangeable with “biological sex.” Today, it is commonly used to describe subjective feelings and social expressions. Many in our current culture say gender is fluid and that your internal sense of self determines your identity. Autonomy (self-rule) is the highest value.

The Bible paints a very different picture. Genesis 1:27 says that we (both male and female) are made in the image of God. This is not arbitrary; it is the way God intentionally designed us. Therefore, identity (what and who we are) is not something that we create, but rather something we receive from God himself. It is based on objective reality, not on personal perceptions.

Naturally, these cultural and biblical views are going to clash.

Digging Deeper: What is Really Going On?

Underneath the gender debate are three timeless and fundamental philosophical questions: questions about reality, truth, and value.

• What is real? Our culture tends to lean either toward materialism (only the physical is real) or spiritualism (everything is divine and connected), but both push God out of the picture. By contrast, biblical theism says not only that God is real, but that he is the creator of all things, and therefore defines what is real. Therefore, we are not the authors of our own reality; that is in his purview alone.
• How do we know what is true? In our current cultural climate, personal feelings are often treated as the ultimate truth. When it comes to gender, this communicates as, “if I feel it, it must be true.” But the Bible roots truth in something unchanging—God’s word and design. It is not that feelings do not matter, rather it is that they are not the final arbiter of truth.
• What is most valuable? Our culture says the highest good is self-expression—being your “authentic” self. But Scripture tells us that our value comes from being created and known by God. Therefore, what is most valuable is life with the creator, especially through Christ. Therefore, we flourish not by following our internal desires, but by living according to God’s design.

Seen side-by-side, the two worldviews are starkly different from one another:

Gender Ethics and Loving Your Neighbor

When people believe that they create their own identity, they see affirmation as the most loving response. Any disagreement doesn’t just feel uncomfortable—it comes across as hateful. That belief drives today’s social pressure to conform to and celebrate every self-defined identity.

But the biblical ethic offers a fundamentally different view. God gives every person value—not based on how they see themselves but based on the fact that God made and sees them as special. Further, since our self-perceptions can be mistaken (as in cases like anorexia), God’s design for us and our bodies provides a more trustworthy foundation.

That reality of God’s good design also changes how we treat people when it comes to the issue of gender. It means we do not need to choose between love and truth; we are called to speak truth in love. We do not affirm falsehoods, but we do not devalue people either. We love by pointing people to the Lord, who gives all people their identity, value, and purpose.

So What Do We Do?

If you’re a Christian reading this, let me encourage you—please engage in this vitally important conversation. Far from being just about politics or being too sensitive to touch, it is at the core of  what it means to be human; the implications are therefore immense. Truth and love are both essential here—Scripture calls us to take every thought captive to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5), and that includes cultural ideas about gender. It also tells us to love our neighbors as ourselves (Mk. 12:30-31). Helping others walk in their God-given identity (as we ourselves desire to walk) in this way is truly loving.

Start with your church family. Have open, gracious conversations grounded in Scripture. Not everything will be easy, but if we begin with shared trust in God’s word, we can push back against cultural confusion and help one another stand firm in truth.

And when it comes to friends, neighbors, or coworkers who do not share your faith, start by listening. Find common ground. You don’t have to lead with a debate. Sometimes pointing to the fruit (for example, how our culture is struggling with meaning, identity, and mental health) can open the door to talk about the deeper roots. Ask good questions. Be gentle and respectful. Show that the biblical worldview is not just true, it is also good and beautiful.

Ultimately, the calling is simple: Understand what’s going on beneath the surface, stay anchored in Scripture, and speak with clarity and compassion. In a culture searching for answers, the gospel gives us the solid grounding for life and identity. Let’s be ready to share it!

Photo retrieved from Unsplash